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[Ponderings] For Raf and Tomorrows

By Philip Suzara


Pondering … as I sit here at the edge of my mythical life pond.


One can see many things happening at the edge of life’s pond, as in any pond. Decisions are made there, life changing decisions, defining moments … to get in the pond, or not. The pond is encircled by its edges in different forms and kinds … straight, jagged, rough, rocks, pebbles, sand, soil, or mud. Very much like people. No matter the differences we have, we all belong there … around the life pond, inside, outside, at the edge, but there.


Have you ever come to think about tomorrow’s coming and that it may come without you or a dear loved one? The mere thought of one not being around tomorrow can definitely be mind boggling … very!


You realize someone is gone and think that, perhaps, it could even be you. Then, you ask, what was it all about? Is it just for the moment we live? There are many things still left undone, but does it really matter, I mean, really matter at all? Yes, what is it really all about when you sort it out?


Still, we ask how much in life we are meant to give, or, are we meant to take more than we give? Are we meant and expected to be kind … to choose to live for others? We sort out the meaning of life, our lives, or of a dear loved one’s. Yes, what is it really all about?


Does life belong only to the strong? Are the fools the only ones who are kind? What more can one offer to add to the golden rule? I am sure that there is a heaven above … and then, yes, there is something more that even non-believers can believe in. Jesus said it and the Beatles put music into it … all you need is LOVE.


We all should believe in love, because without true love you just exist, and you are nothing until you find the love you’ve missed. You let your heart lead the way when you come to crossroads in relating with others, even with yourself … and you will always find a place of love … for love’s sake.


We lost a dear one yesterday, Raf, my brother’s son who calls me his bro. I wake up to a world without Raf, yes, actually, the world without Raf … today. One wonders what the day is like without him, what the future is like without him. And I wonder … profoundly. I am sure his siblings wonder … his mother, too. His cousins and friends, too, they who seemed to never had enough of him. They wonder … we all wonder.


There are insights to one’s going on ahead, of passing away sooner than we could ever imagine. There are always lessons they leave behind for those whom they love, for us.


You thought you knew what life was all about, finding security, and having fun, and feeling comfortable. Yet, now, we are not so sure of what the whole thing is all about, our existence and our realities … what life is really all about. Having feelings of emptiness even when life was still very much around … we look for meaning, we look and long for love. A lot of our spiritual needs are buried in all our individual lives and we seek enlightenment and fulfilment from God above even as we ask what life is all about.


We come to find that there is meaning in a life lived for others, we find deep purpose in our otherwise bland existence … we were not meant to live our lives like that, and there is life when one offers and shares his love. As Raf did, and as he had wanted to do, some more.

Thanking you for the beautiful life you have shared with us, Raf, as with the wonderful moments experienced with you by countless many others. With your passing, you gently remind us to love … and love deeply. This we share with others, to others … all you need is LOVE!


And we shall understand that when tomorrow comes, and starts without you, you are home now, but not far apart from us, because you are very much right here in our hearts.

Pondering … as I sit here at the edge of life’s pond.


nb …


It was a dark, troublesome, and painful time when I was struggling with these thoughts, but my friends Burt and Hal came and whispered words of wisdom … just let it be.







Philip Suzara

Creature of God. Child of the Universe. Global Citizen. Lover of Life. Freedom Fighter. Agent of Change. Lone Wolf. Occasional Consultant for Strategic Communications.


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1 Comment


Monchu Nolasco
Monchu Nolasco
Jun 09, 2021

Beautiful Tito Leps!

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